All the Good News

First, thanks to everyone on the forum that liked yesterday's blog. Thanks for all the positive feedback. For those who were worried that the negative stuff was getting to me, don't worry. I wasn't mad, or hurt. I just felt it was time to speak up for all you positive folks. I know sometimes the negative people are so loud it feels like that's all that's happening, but the negatives are truly a small, small number of people. I won't let them get me down, if you don't let them get you down. Deal?

Second, to the readers that read the hints about THE HARLEQUIN and were concerned that Nathaniel was changing too much; he's not changing that much. For the one post that worried he'd turn into another Richard (I assume you mean by that, he and Anita would stop getting along well) don't worry. Nathaniel is simply asking Anita to do things in their relationship that meets some needs that have been neglected. No worries, okay.

Third, MISTRAL'S KISS is number eight on THE NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER LIST. It was posted on-line a few days back, but truthfully, for me, it's only real when I see it in print. Old-fashioned of me, but the on-line just isn't quite as real to me. So thanks to everyone who bought the book, and all the book store people that talked about it. We're number eight! And if you've seen who else is on the list, you'll know how happy I am to be there. Christmas is a tough time on the list, a lot of heavy hitters slugging it out. Every Merry book has made the list, and every Anita book starting with ten, NARCISSUS IN CHAINS, have made the printed list. Printed list is only the first fifteen in each category. Pretty darn cool, eh? Almost as good as making the list and having the sales figures being even higher than the last Merry book, is the fact that Jon and I didn't have to tour. Sales are up by a lot, we've cracked the top ten of THE TIMES LIST, and we got to stay home. Yea!

Dear Negative Reader

Dear Negative Reader,

It's funny, I almost never go on the board. I think I can count on one hand the times I've seen the message board. I would pick tonight. I'd had a nice evening out with friends. I'd read a chapter of Trin's new Fairy Realm book to her. Then for some reason, we look at the board. I look at the board.

Let me say that all of you that hate the books, and have decided not to read them anymore, I am happy for you. I know that when a book series that I read takes a turn I don't like I stop reading it. I put it down and I walk away, and that's that. If you're unhappy with my books, and have decided you never want to read another thing that I write; great. I mean that. Life is too short to read books you don't like, so if you're not having a good time, stop doing it. I'm sure there are other books out there that will make you happier than mine. There are books with less sex in them, God knows. There are books that don't make you think that hard. Books that don't push you past that comfortable envelope of the mundane. If you want to be comforted, don't read my books. They aren't comfortable books. They are books that push my character and me to the edge and beyond of our comfort zones. If that's not want you want, then stop reading. Put my books away with other things that frighten and confuse or just piss you off. I have my list of stuff like that. So good for you, you've decided not to read me anymore. Good luck, God speed.

But let me say, one thing puzzles me. When I decide not to read an author, or series again. I don't go on their message board and keep talking about the books I don't want to read. I don't say that I stopped reading at a certain book, but strangely, am still able to talk in detail about books that have come out since then, thus making people reading my post wonder how I know so many details if I haven't read the books. Either A: You have read the books, and don't want to admit it. Or, B: You haven't read the books and you are taking your opinion from the posts of others who have read the books, and hated them. Those are the only choices I've been able to come up with. If there is a more logical explanation, I can't find it. Either you are closet readers, or you're letting others read them and report back to you like negative scouting. So you're left with an opinion based on someone else's opinion, or you are reading the books in secret. If the latter, you seem to hate yourself and me for the fact that you read the books. I recommend you don't read the books, it will save you pain, and give you more time to read things you like. It seems a logical solution.

Let this post also put to rest the idea that I don't know that a small minority, albeit a loud minority, hates my series. I've known that for awhile. Like the first time someone stood in line for hours at a signing, smiled at me, and had me sign the book, then said to my face, "I hated this book. I hate what you've done with the series." I blinked at them, and said something like, "Sorry to hear that." When I ask, "Why do you read the books then?" Answer, "I keep hoping they'll get good again." Jon and I have heard variations of this across the country from a maybe five people. But strangely, having someone say to your face, that they hate your books and at least twice, that they hate you stand out in our minds. Since I wouldn't stand in line for hours to tell someone I loved their work, the fact that people stand in line for hours to tell me they hate my work, just puzzles the hell out of me. I don't get it guys. I'm not going to get it. I finally realized that I'm not going to understand this noisy, unpleasant minority of my fans. Because you are fans. Only fans would spend this much time and energy on anything. It's a strange kind of fan, a negative fan, but you spend so much time and energy hating and complaining that some part of you must love the hate and complaining. It's the only explanation I've been able to come up with. But I don't really understand.

And if you don't think you are the minority, well, sorry, guys but you are. I have the sales figures to prove it. Each book’s sales are more than the last. The vast majority of people standing in line love the books, love the series, and tell us so. Some people even ask for more police procedural. I want more, too. If the person asks nicely, not rudely, or in that tone that seems to imply if I don't do what they want the series is doomed to failure, I listen. The arduer is a pain in my, and Anita's butt, too. But I believe in my world. I've done this major metaphysical event. I won't just 'fix it' because it's hard to write around. God, knows, sometimes it is. But the arduer is moving along. I've got my fix in mind, but it's logical, not something that's merely convenient, or because some people hate it. But the arduer is not going away. If that's what you guys are wanting, then it ain't happening. Leave now, because more arduer awaits. The arduer is evolving, as are Anita's powers, but I don't see the arduer going poof.

As for the people who keep suggesting that I simply start killing characters because Anita has too many men in her life . . . The characters aren't real to you. They are real to me, and to a lot of other people. I, and a lot of readers, would feel an emotional loss if some of these guys died. Obviously, you, negative reader, do not feel anything for the people you would urge me to destroy. I am sorry you do not love them, or at least like them, as I do. I have failed as a writer that you could kill them, and feel nothing. There are series out there that have many fewer characters. Go read them. There are series out there that it's obvious the writer sees the character only as a plot device, a means to an end. Go read those people, and you and that kind of writer can have a good, non threatening time. You can read about people that the writer could and does kill with little or no remorse. But I am not that kind of writer. I don't enjoy reading that kind of writer, so I don't write that way. My characters are real to me in a way that makes me miss them. For God's sake, I'll be in the mall and see something, and go, "Oh, it's the perfect gift for (fill in the blank)." I've been in line with the present in my hand, before I go, "Wait, these are make believe people. I can't buy them a Christmas present." I guess I could, but there's no way to give it to them. They aren't THAT real. But they are real enough that I see things that make me think of them in the way you think of a boyfriend or a husband, or a best friend. To suggest that I just start killing some of them, to make things easier to write and more comfortable for you, negative reader, to read, is sort of well, you put in the word. I can think of several, but you choose. You choose with this understanding. The holidays are only just past. Think back to the moment you stood in line, or saw in the window, that perfect gift. The one that you knew would make someone smile. That gift you knew, you just knew, would light their faces up. Remember how warm and happy it made you to find that present. Remember the anticipation of the joy it would bring the person you care about? Now, remember that I've done the same thing for many of the characters you would have me kill. They aren't real, but sometimes they feel real to me. If that level of involvement with imaginary friends seems crazy to you, well, then I can't explain it. You either understand that the biggest disappoint some years is that I can't walk into the other room and hand that imaginary person a present that I know they would love. I wouldn't know what to do with most of my characters for real, twenty-four seven, but sometimes I, like the positive fans, wish they were real in a way that mere imagination cannot make them. Maybe you, my negative reader, did not understand how I feel about them. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt. You didn't understand that they are real to me. Or maybe this will not move you, maybe you do not feel for the loneliness of the vampires that have not known love for centuries. Maybe you do not feel for Anita's torment as she's pushed further and further outside her comfort zones. Maybe you do not feel any of that. If you don't feel it, then I have failed you as a writer. I am sorry for that. If you do not feel the touch of my characters, the emotional pain, the emotional triumphs, then I have failed you. You should stop reading me. My writing does not weave magic for you. I am sorry. Go, with my blessing, but do please go. I have done my best for fourteen books, and it is not good enough for you. I cannot reach you. It must be some failing in the writing, in me, but whatever the cause it does not speak to you. Go, and find someone who does speak to you. Someone who's characters are plot devices, so the books are neat, understandable, clinical, and utterly organized. My books are logical, to me, understandable to the vast majority of my readers, but they are not neat, they are not utterly organized or clinical. They are big, messy books, a lot like life. I wish you luck out there finding a writer that speaks to you. If we all liked the same kind of writer we'd all read the same books, and we don't. So go out there, find someone you like better, read them. You will be happier. I want all my readers to be happy, so go be happy. Enjoy the rest of your life. I mean that. I'll give you guys a few minutes to stop reading this, or to go into another room. I'll give you a few minutes, before I talk to the positive readers that are staying.

If you are still a negative reader, please leave. Please do not read beyond this point. Warning, warning, warning. The next bit of this message is for the positive people. For the people who love my characters, or at least don't hate them. Negative readers, are you gone? Are they gone? Did they leave? So hard to tell online.

Okay, now it's just us positive people. Yea! For those who are positive people, and are continuing to read the Anita series, here are hints about THE HARLEQUIN. First, Edward is in the book in a major way. Second, so is Olaf. Yeah, serial killer guy is back. Anita ends up feeding full blown arduer on three characters she's never been with before. And she, and I, are okay with them. Some of the stuff in DANSE MACABRE was over the edge of whatever for both her and me. Anita is really, really, looking forward to having more control over the arduer. I can't tell you who the three characters are without giving too much plot away, sorry. I'll ask Darla and Jon if there's a way to hint without spoiling it. I am sooo bad at hinting. One of the wereanimal groups will betray Jean-Claude, and Anita. Marmee Noir will be back. Belle Morte makes a guest appearance that caught me, and Anita by surprise. Nathaniel will be asking Anita to step up to bat for their relationship. What does that mean? Let's just say that what Nathaniel wants out of a relationship and what Anita wants out of one, may not match. Relationships are all about compromise. I know, I know, Anita doesn't compromise, but she's trying. She really is. The Church of Eternal Life is back on stage. Malcolm is coming to Anita and Jean-Claude for help. You know he must be desperate to come to them, and he is. We learn what happens to bad little vampires when the council decides to act. You didn't really think they did their own dirty work, did you? Asher gets to show there's a reason beyond sentimentality that he is Jean-Claude's second in command. We finally get to talk to Edward about his domestic arrangements in more detail. Is he, or isn't he? Will he, or won't he? Should he?

Are those enough hints? Are there too many? I hope it whetted your appetite, but didn't drive you nuts not knowing exactly what I'm referring to. There's so much else I could put down, but I'm not sure I could do it without giving too much away.

Sometimes less is more

Just got back from Dinner with friends. Jim, Joan, and their kiddo were one of the groups of friends that we never seemed to get to see. We went on vacation with them this summer, but it was the first we'd seen each other in ages. So we made a resolution to try and see each other more. It had that feel to it of New Year's resolutions that you make, but don't keep. Good intentions with no follow through. Their schedule is about as insane as ours, so it was hard to get together. I called them, got Joan, suggested we all meet for dinner one month. In fact, I suggested we try to get together once a month and all have dinner. We've actually managed it every month except one since we came up with the idea. The problem was, that I, as usual, tried to be too ambitious. I kept waiting for us to have time to visit for a day, or at least an afternoon. But to get all our schedules open enough to do that, well, it just wasn't happening. So I scaled back. I decided it was better to have a shorter visit more often than try to schedule a big visit and never get it. Sometimes a little bit of what you want, is better than holding out for all of what you want, and never getting it. It's a lesson that I'm only now learning. I guess, some lessons are harder than others.

I did six pages today of the new chapter for THE HARLEQUIN. I made notes for the next two scenes. Those of you who have read the blog for awhile know that here too, on the page count, I usually beat myself up if I don't do at least eight pages a day. Well, you know what, somedays there is simply no way to do it. I've scaled down to my page count of years ago, four pages minimum. If I get more than that, great, but I need at least that. Four pages is doable. It's a goal that I can sit down at the computer no matter how tired, or not feeling well, and I can screw my courage to the sticking point and say, four pages, I can do that. Eight would seem too much, but four is doable. It also gives me permission to stop for the day before I'm exhausted. Now, sometimes the muse is in full swing and we laugh at only four pages, but the muse and I are a little tired lately. Or maybe distracted with all the different projects. Whatever the cause, scaling down makes both me and my imagination feel better. Maybe here, too, less is more. Trying for less and achieving it, is better than trying for a lot and failing. Because the failure starts a whole line of bad stuff in my head. Succeeding, is simply a more positive thing to do than failing. Sounds so simple, but sometimes the simple lessons are the hardest to grasp.

Bits and pieces

It's been a very busy day. Dealt with a lot of business stuff. A lot of problems smoothed out. I just finished four pages on one of the new chapters that needed to be added to THE HARLEQUIN, and four pages is enough for the day. I'm tired, and fighting off a headache. I think this is definitely one of those days when it will all look better in the morning. Though, if I remember correctly, we're planning to help our kiddo clean her room tomorrow morning. After Santa's visit there are too many toys, too much stuff. The Kiddo is overwhelmed, and there's too much for anyone to organize it. Thanks to her being scarred by the Toy Story movies from Disney, she has never wanted to get rid of or throw away a toy, because it will feel bad. She's old enough to know that it's probably not true, but still young enough to not be sure it's not true. So, Jon and I will help her choose tomorrow. I think that box of bits and pieces of broken toys can finally go away. Wish us good luck with it. It's probably going to be at least a little traumatic for her, which means it's also a little traumatic, or at least stressful, for us. Funny how that works when you're a parent.

Date night

Jon and I finally got to put some date in our date night. We usually stay in, and sometimes we do what you think we do, and sometimes we watch tons of none child safe TIVO. But it had been a while since we actually went out just us for a date. We did traditional dinner and a movie. I'm not sure it mattered what we did, as long as we did it together, and it was just us. We saw the new James Bond movie, Casino Royale. We both loved it. The violence was pretty realistic without giving you as much blood as you'd actually get from that much pounding. My friend, Sharon, called the violence brutal. It wasn't brutal, just more real. Bond is back in a way that is closer to the book character and more nitty-gritty than anything I've seen since Sean Connery.

Happy Boxing day, and Happy St. Stephen's Day

It's Boxing Day in parts of Europe. It's also St. Stephen's day a traditional day in some parts of the British isles for hunting the wren. To my knowledge no one actually still harms the birds. But every St. Stephen's day we put out food for the birds, to sort of take back this day and make it a positive thing for our little feathered friends. And, to make the tradition more fun, there was a wren on the suet feeder this morning just outside the kitchen window. A Carolina wren, which does not exist in Europe. So happy St. Stephen's Day; save the birds. It's good luck to see a wren today, so keep your eyes open. They're small, brown and buff and ivory. An elegant little bird with a cocked tail, and a jaunty attitude. Hope you spot a wren today. It was very kind of mine to come to the window for breakfast. Terribly convenient. I'm back to work. Putting the finishing touches on the opening for the sixteenth Anita book, so I can put it to bed and concentrate on Merry. If that goes quickly I'll either give a try at the extra chapter that I need for THE HARLEQUIN, or I'll take another crack at the opening for A LICK OF FROST. I needed not to be wedded to an opening for this book. I needed to be forced to go back over and reread some of the latest books. It opened up a lot of plot points that need wrapping up, that I might have neglected. But, damn, it is so much harder to start with a blank screen. I think at the end of this one I will go back to doing my opening of the next book when A LICK OF FROST is done. But for this one, I believe it was necessary. It still makes my life harder. But I saw a wren on St. Stephen's day. Good luck for the year; if you believe.

Oh Christmas Tree...

Nothing much to report. so I'm posting some pictures of the Christmas Trees in Laurell's Office.

Enjoy

What I did yesterday

Charles came over for lunch yesterday. It turned out to be very good timing. I'd just finished rewriting the beginning of the next Anita book. Yes, finally, I'm happy that this chapter is the beginning. I now have two other chapters that go somewhere near the beginning, possibly two and three, but maybe four and five. But still, really cool. But why was Charles coming by a good thing, more than just the pleasure of his company? He's police. I had the police interacting with Anita in the first chapter. I needed to ask some opinions of someone who's done this for real, and viola Charles is here. So part of lunch was discussing work, which usually happens when I get around anyone with a police or military background. I just can't help myself, we talk shop.

The four pages of the new Merry book had to be scrapped because it wasn't Merry; it was Anita. It was so Anita's voice, just the characters were different. I have to get Anita out of my head before I can move on to Merry. Which means I've got to finish the rewrite of THE HARLEQIN before I can really start on Merry. Because I can't afford to have Anita's voice out of my head while still trying to write her, just so I can start Merry earlier. Sigh. So while I'm working on the rewrite for Anita, I've also started the next book so when I sit down months from now I won't have a blank screen to start with. Yea!

Happy Winter Solstice

Tonight is the longest night of the year; Winter Solstice. Every culture that I am aware of has some sort of holiday around this time of year. Most with some theme of doing something to encourage the sun to return. Usually something involving light or fire, or bells, or evergreens, and gift giving for some reason. Some see it as the darkness and the light fighting, and after this night the sun will begin to grow in strength. Our own religion has a version of this in the Holly King and Oak King. The Holly King ruled the year until tonight, but he will give his crown to the Oak King who will rule until Summer Solstice. Truthfully, it would make more sense to Jon and I to crown the Holly King at winter and the Oak King at summer, but this was the tradition as I can find it written up. It's the tradition that most Wiccans follow, but we are puzzled by it. If it makes more sense to us to have the Holly king crowned at Yule, could we do that, change it, or would that be not okay? I mean one of the pluses of having a new religion is that the rules aren't set in stone. In fact, one of the things that most neo-pagans like about their flavor of faith is that it's not a religion of the book, as they say. Yes, it's based on old religious beliefs and customs, but modern Wicca really dates to Gerald Gardner. Good ol' Uncle Gerry, is really the founder of our faith in many ways. We hold to festivals and ways of faith that are older than Christianity, but the way we put it all together is new. I guess our faith is like a marriage; something old, something new, something borrowed . . . okay, I don't know where the blue comes in. I mean blue can mean healing, or Goddess energy, or both. Blue can stand for the element of water, or air. Blue can represent the God, as well, the blue of the sky and him watching over us. So, let it stand, something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue. Keep the light shining, tomorrow the sun returns.

MISTRAL'S KISS going back to print

You know how the comic book has been selling out and going back to reprint, or reissue, almost immediately? Well, MISTRAL'S KISS is going back to print, too. I actually knew this bit of news a couple of days ago, but was getting the okay to put it on the blog. Less than a week on sale and MISTRAL'S KISS is going back to print. So if you're a fanatic about having a first edition get to the store soon, because when these are gone it will be second printing coming. Pretty cool, eh?

Jon and I got to see more pencils for, I think, the fourth comic book, yes, the fourth, because the third is coming next week. More really cool artwork.

It's great that the new Merry book is doing so great. But I am now less than six months out from the due date for the next book. Like have it on someone's desk in New York. Nope, I'm not done with THE HARLEQUIN. Once all the edits are transferred to one manuscript copy I've got about a week to two weeks to finish up. Which is about when it's due back in New York. Funny that. That's two weeks after Christmas, mind you. But if I wait until the end of January to start on Merry six, A LICK OF FROST, then I'll have only four months to finish the book. I've finished books in four months, it ain't pretty. So, today I sat my butt in a chair and began. Four pages done today, not a bad start. I'll flesh it out tomorrow, a little. It's close to fine as is. I know the first chapter. I know the main mystery plot. I know what loose ends from some other books are going to be followed to a conclusion. I wish I could take down the Anita sticky notes, and put up the growing number of Merry sticky notes over the computer. But Anita is not done, and the sticky notes are about the rewrite, or a lot of them are about the rewrite. So part of my process is a little stifled, because where do I put the Merry sticky notes. I'm not out of wall, I'm just out of wall directly above and around my computer. Sigh. I'm really beginning to wonder about that whole change in date for the next Anita. You guys get the book about six months early, but that means my end of things has to be done that much earlier. Not easy on my side of things. In fact, I'm pretty tired. Not good to be this tired at the beginning of a book. Wasn't I supposed to get a vacation in here somewhere?

And the computer has locked up twice in a week's time. Remember I was going to buy a new computer when THE HARLEQUIN was finished? Well, yeah, but now I've started the next book, so . . . When to buy that computer? We've moved everything to the laptop in my office, so if this computer goes down, it doesn't take everything with it. But both Darla and Jon are telling me it's day's are numbered. Sigh, again.

The news is all good. In fact, it's amazing. But I'm going to bed and cuddle my husband. It'll all look easier in the morning after a good night's sleep.

First editions, second printings, and art work

Comic book news: The 20th of this month, like Wednesday, tomorrow of this week is the second printing of issue #2. If you want it, I suggest speed to your local shop and snatch it up. If this printing goes as fast as last printing, well, if you want it you need not to hesitate. It's fantastic that the comic is selling so well, but I understand that some of you guys are frustrated trying to get the issues. Sorry about that.

The 27th of this month, Wednesday, next week, is issue #3. Again, if you want a copy, then get it fast. I'm left in the odd position of apologizing for the success of a project. Sorry, the comics are selling so well that some of you are having trouble getting them.

the following is a final color version of one of the pages in Issue #3

Finally a Blog I can put up.

I've written several blogs over the last day or so, none of which I can put up. A little too personal. It's only the second Christmas since my grandmother, who raised me, died. I'm one of those people that doesn't mourn at the beginning of things much. I don't do it on purpose, but I tend to be fine during the initial catastrophe. I'm a pillar of strength, then a year, or more later, when everyone else has pretty much moved on, grieved, it'll hit me. I know why I do it, I guess. Because my birth family were all so caught up in their own grief that there was no room for mine, or that's how it felt, so I didn't grieve. I don't mean about my grandmother, I'm pretty much thinking of my mother. It would be the defining moment of my childhood and many lessons were learned during that time. Lessons both good and bad. It would take me about twenty years to truly grieve for my mother, I guess a year and some change for my grandmother is actually an improvement. Let's hear it for therapy.

The book was out but all through the house, not a creature was stirring

Yesterday was the quietest laydown day date I've ever had. I know that MISTRAL'S KISS is out. I'm hearing from you guys who have blown through it in hours. Thanks for the lovely complements. But, for me, and Jon, and the crew here it's sort of strange, and quiet, too quiet, as they say. The sales figures are amazing. The preorders, wonderful, too. Though since it's actually out now, are they still preorders, or just orders?

For those who are asking Darla and the fan club when will there be signings, there won't be. At least not in December, and last I heard, not in January. I finally had to admit that I'm not Superwoman. I can't do it all. It disappoints me, too, but it's still the truth. I don't tour on major holidays, but especially this holiday. My kid still believes in Father Christmas. I want to enjoy that while I still can, because it won't last. In fact, I think we're just sneaking it in under the wire this year. Also, I have a few weeks to do the edits on THE HARELQUIN. About as many weeks as a standard tour would take. I can't do both the tour and the edits. To get THE HARLEQUIN out in June, means I can't miss the edit deadlines. Also, I'm trying to write the beginning of the next Anita book, as is my habit, so that months from now I won't be sitting down to a blank screen. In trying to find the next book, I've stumbled onto the next novel-lite. Interesting. When I finish the edits for THE HARLEQUIN I get to sit down and begin Merry #6: A LICK OF FROST. I love the title, if I do say so myself. Strangely, I did not do a beginning for this book when I finished up MISTRAL'S KISS. I was just too drained, and, well, I just didn't. If it was an Anita book this would make me feel anxious, and Anita would feel anxious, too. Merry is fine with it, and so am I. In fact, I'm more eager to sit down to A LICK OF FROST because I don't know where I'm beginning, or exactly where I'll end up. Anita likes control and knowing at least the start, but Merry isn't the control freak that Anita and I are, go figure. I'm actually excited about flinging myself onto that blank page and seeing what happens. I do know the overall plot of Merry's story arc. I know where I'm headed, I have my map, but maybe the Merry books will write smoother if I don't try to over plan the trip.

I hope everyone enjoys reading MISTRAL'S KISS, as much as I enjoyed writing it. Now I'm back to work, so I can get that next book to you guys as soon as possible. I'm already hearing from people, where is the next book, and write faster. So, I'm off, to try to do fulfill both wishes.

MISTRAL'S KISS

I've been trying all day to put up a blog. It just won't post. No idea what's wrong with it. So here's a shorter blog, one more try.

MISTRAL'S KISS is released tomorrow December 12th! Yea!

Okay, here goes, hope it posts.

Dogs at my computer

Good thing I can touch type because Sasquatch is sitting in front of my keyboard. Yes, he's a pug and that makes him a toy breed, but pugs are the beefy end of the toy scale, so when he actually sits up he blocks part of my view of the keyboard. But, I was the one who taught him the joys of falling asleep in front of the keyboard as a puppy. My first pug Pugsley was the only dog I've had yet that would scoot me forward in the chair, so she could sleep in the back of it. But Sasquatch was so cute as a puppy that I let him sit in front of the keyboard, and now that he's five, it's still cute, but also a little irritating. More irritating is the fact that I taught Pip, our sixty pound boxer/pug/Brittany mix, the same thing. He was supposed to top out at thirty pounds, so much for the vet estimating size as a puppy. Pip, sadly, has had to give up the pleasure of sleeping in front of the computer, there are limits to even my ability to type with a dog across my arms. Frankly, he's now too big to fall asleep in my lap without a great deal of effort on my part. I'd never have taught him to be such a lap dog if I'd known he was going to be so big. One of the joys of a mixed breed dog is that surprise package stuff. Pip has also made me hesitate about ever owning a hundred percent boxer. They are great dogs, but they are a lot of dog if you do it right, and if you're not going to do it right, why do it at all? Our fifty percent boxer is plenty boxer for our household. The pugs still don't know what to do with all that boxer jump and energy some days. But it's the jump and energy that makes a boxer. How can you not love a breed that you need one command just to give the dog permission to jump up on hind legs and look you in the eyes? There's a weight and demand to Pip's expression sometimes. It's the most Brittany of him, that soulful, utterly intent look. That and the few times he's actually done a perfect point to show us where birds are. Seeing a boxer with a huge black donut tail do a perfect point was way cool. I'm hoping in the coming year to get him into more obedience, with an eye for either agility or scent trailing/tracking. That big brain and that Brittany instinct seems a terrible thing to waste. The pug part calms him down just enough to make him our Big Puppy.

Catching up

Our first weekend just Jon and I in about a month. Our first weekend with power, heat, warmth, light, etc . . . What are we doing with our first weekend? Friday night was dinner at a nice restaurant with our friend Richard. But Saturday was all for Jon and me. We did some of what you think we'd be doing, thank you. But we also did errands together; pet store, wild bird store, groceries. Went to our favorite metaphysical store. Yule; Winter Solstice; Christmas; is just around the corner, so present buying time. But what we did next was something we hadn't done in, well, ages, much longer than a month. We came back home and went to separate parts of the house and got to be alone. Jon went to his office and played a new computer game, Dawn of War: Dark Crusade. I stayed in the family room curled up on the couch with the dogs and read. Just me, the dogs, a fire in the fireplace, a cup of tea, and a good book. That is a little slice of heaven. What book? SOME DANGER INVOLVED by Will Thomas, it's the first in his historical mystery series. It was a rousing book, made me gasp, made me laugh out loud, and the fact that it is his first novel ever, makes me have high hopes for the next book, which I have already. Very cool. Oh, and I got a two hour bath after breakfast this morning. I felt terribly decadent, but it was wonderful. Then we did errands, had lunch out, and then back home to have our separate alone times. We were both way overdue for some alone time. I fed the dogs, then Jon came back over to the main part of the house and we had dinner. He cooked. I do love a man who's domestic. We watched the first episode of a British television series that we'd bought but not had time to watch. It is soooo not Trinity safe. What series? McCallum starring John Hannah. If the first episode is any indication, wow. After an hour of television we turned off the boob tube, and we both read, different books. What book did Jon read? THE ARMOUR OF CONTEMPT by Dan Abnett. It's the latest Gaunt's Ghosts book. We both finished our respective books, with the dogs curled around us, and now it's time for bed. Time to go to a warm winter's sleep tucked up in clean sheets with the person you love curled beside you. I feel more relaxed than I've felt in ages. I think sometimes I get so focused on everything that has to be done, that I forget to do some things that never have to be done, but if you never do them, it hurts your heart, your soul, and your mind. Today has been a refreshing day, as if I've caught a deep breath I'd been chasing. I hope your day has gone well, too. I hope your night will be even better. G'night, all.

Muse and anti-muse

My goal for the day is to be positive. To say, think, and react in a positive manner. I seem to have fallen into the sloth of grumpiness. The only way out is to act as if . . . Act as if I'm in a good mood. Act as if I'm not tired. Act as if . . . Oh, lots of things. The point is this; I must be positive to feel positive. I've already meditated today, and that helped for awhile, but the pessimist in me is just kicking the crap out of the optomist. You know how in cartoons it's a little angel on one shoulder and a little devil on the other? I don't think it's that simple. I think you have a muse that is the voice that helps you achieve your greatest good, your greatest life plan, but the other side isn't a devil. It's more an imp. That is the voice that tells you, can't, that you're a failure, that you're ugly, fat, clumsy, fill in your negative. This is the voice that tells you, why even try you'll just fail. This is the voice that eats your life and helps you waste all your talents in envy of others, in finding excuses not to persue your own work, your own dream. Turn to your muse, your message, your Diety given gifts, and use them. Muses aren't just about writing and drawing, but about any endeavor that takes intellect and that spark of the divine, that spark of genius. That other voice, that negative voice, wants you to fail, wants your dreams to be wasted. It isn't as simple as good vs. evil, that is too black and white. The negative voice, the anti-muse, doesn't try to get most of us to do actual evil things, kill people, rape, pillage, and burn. The anti-muse just tells you that you are not good enough. It finds that small piece of doubt, or self-hatred, and fans it into a forest fire of self-defeat. Embrace your muse, do not listen to the anti-muse. Love yourself, or act as if you do. That's what I'm going to do today. I started to type, try and do, but there is no try, there is only do. Quoting Yoda before lunch, a good sign?

Pages

I did fifteen pages today. Fifteen pages of the next Anita book. Its about what I did of THE HARLEQUIN so many months ago, so I wouldn't be starting with a blank page. Frankly, I'm not sure if it's book sixteen, or if it's the beginning of a novel-lite. Tired, not sure. But I know I have to stop working on it, so I can finish edits of THE HARLEQUIN, and start Merry number 6.

MISTRAL'S KISS comes out next week. Merry number 5. There was a time just after my first series was rejected that I thought I'd never sell another book. Now here I am editing book fifteen of one series, and days away from the release of a fifth in another series. Both series are New York Times bestsellers. Both of them are mixed genre which I was told, years ago, did not sell. I lost track of the number of agents, editors and publishers that told me what I wanted to write didn't have an audience, would never be successful. The market was flooded with vampire books, why write another? When I wanted to write a modern day fairie tale with real fairies, I was told to just keep writing about vampires. It was doing pretty good, why try to write something else? I write because no one was writing vampires the way I wanted to read them almost twenty years ago. No one was doing the fey the way I wanted to see them, so, like The Little Red Hen, I'd do it myself.

I seem to have started a sub-genre. Is it paranormal romance, gumshoe fantasy, urban fantasy romance? No one's really come up with that perfect phrase. If we could just come up with something as cool sounding as cyberpunk, but alas, I don't know what to call it either. My books read more like hard-boiled mysteries, or horror novels in tone of writing, but the romance and the magic is most definitely there, too. What do I write? What I want to read. Isn't that what all writers write?

Fire and Ice

My earlier positive mood has evaporated. Sometimes I think that I only have so much good mood in me per day, and once it's used up, well, it's used up. It is the first day with power. The first day of being deliciously warm. I'm still wearing a sweater over my t-shirt, and have for most of the day. It's as if the chill has sunk into m' bones. I'd forgotten what it felt like to be truly cold. That unrelenting cold that comes from day after day of not being quite warm enough. It wears at your mind, your body, your emotions. You can build up a tolerance to it, but it is a shock to the system.

I'll leave you with someone else's words, a poem that ran through my mind in the days without power.

2. Fire and Ice

(From Harper's Magazine, December 1920.)


SOME say the world will end in fire,
Some say in ice.
From what I've tasted of desire
I hold with those who favor fire.
But if it had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To know that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice.

Robert Frost (1874-1963). Miscellaneous Poems to 1920.

Hey, guys, we got power!

We're back online, powered up, juiced; pick your term. The power came on just before 3:00 this afternoon. The water came back on at about the same time. Apparently, one of the water mains had frozen and burst. The water, thankfully, was only off for part of today. I cannot tell you how wonderful it was when the electric came back on. My office is still cold. It's going to take awhile to heat it all back up, but that's okay. I'm just blogging this to everyone to say we're back, then I'll go to another part of the house where it's warmer. Smaller room, fewer windows, heats up faster. There were so many things I thought of to blog while the power was out. Some sad, some angry, some positive, but the power was out, so nothing could be done. We went out to a local book store and did some editing on the current comic script which is like due tomorrow for changes, or something close to that. I have to admit that for the first time I missed my e-mail and my on-line comics in a major way. I was reading the comics in the summer when we lost power for five days, but I wasn't doing e-mail. I was still having Jon or Darla print out stuff. I have now graduated to reading on screen. Something I thought I would never do. I actually missed more tech than just my computer for writing. Perhaps I will not be a leadite forever. There is too much, and too many ideas came to me, and news, and nothing, just those random thoughts you get in an emergency. But for tonight, hello out there, we have power. Yea!

Powerless Again

The power went out last night. And it was freezing. :(

Anyway, we're out and about charging phones and laptops and having hot food and drink.

Upside: We have gas furnaces in the house and a gas fireplace in the living room and the insulation in most of the house is above par. :)

Downside: the blowers in all the furnaces are electric. :(

Anywho, I'll post something once we're back up.